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02/03/2003: "Quivering with desire, Bea Arthur removed Tommy Lasorda's shirt..."

The Washington Post recently had a contest where readers were asked to write lines from a very, very bad sex scene in a novel. The "winners" are here (scroll down past the faux Hirschfelds). Some of them aren't bad. This one sounds like it came out of a Spider Robinson novel: Lisa felt the Earth move. It started at 1.5 on the Richter scale, but rose in waves to a 7.3, equivalent in size to the 1989 Bay Area quake. Aftershocks ranged from 3.1 to 5.4. ...and some are just... well, read for yourself.